Health risks of wedding inspiration

I’m usually pretty good with so-called wedding inspiration. Though there are occasional exceptions, generally my eye passes over inspirational pictures of centerpieces and flags with “yay!” on them without sticking. I don’t eat my heart out wishing to look like model-beautiful white ladies on wedding blogs because I realise I am not a white lady, much less a model-beautiful one.

(Of course there are sometimes model-beautiful East Asian ladies on wedding blogs also, but they are easy to dismiss. I wave my hand and say, “Aha, but I don’t live in California” or “But I was born with a differently shaped face.” Sorted!)

But today I saw something which made me sit up and stretch my eyes. It is the sort of thing for which my Things you’d only have at a wedding tag was created.

 Via Clockwork Events

It’s an elephant made of flowers. Had you ever imagined anything so beautiful in your life? I want one desperately. This really truly is the first time I have seriously considered that 9 months’ conscientious DIYing might be worth doing. Alternatively, I suppose, I could ask a florist to provide a quote for how much it would cost for them to do it, but I can do the quote myself: THREE BAZILLION.

If you would like to do an absurd, completely pointless elephant topiary DIY for your wedding, you can buy an elephant topiary frame here. You are meant to weight the legs and use floral foam to stick the flowers in.

You are wondering whether I am actually going to rush off and construct an elephant made of flowers for my wedding. Of course not. I shall discuss it with my fiance first.


On the same subject of “what the hell why would you even spend money on that”, here are a couple of things from the Monsoon sale that you can purchase if you are planning a vintage shabby chic event.

LOVE letters, £29.99

You can put them somewhere in one of your venues! They are probably more relevant than the one that says HOME. The fact that I am actually considering buying them says a lot about my state of mind at the moment. Mostly it says, “Stop looking at Style Me Pretty.”

There’s also bunting, if you’d like some. They have cute print bunting (above) and plain multi-coloured bunting. You get 350cm for £10.50. I think bunting is nice, but feel, as with fruitcake, that you probably have to have grown up with it to care much.